The Curse of Over-Control
How Micromanagement Drains Energy and Trust
He didn’t mean to become a micromanager.
In fact, when he first stepped into leadership, he promised himself he’d never hover the way his old boss did. But six months into running a high-stakes project, there he was… correcting every draft, double-checking every number, and rewriting half the external emails his team wrote.
The more stressed he felt, the more he controlled.
The more he controlled, the more his team shut down and handed over the work.
This is the Curse of Over-Control.
Why Leaders Slip Into Micromanagement
Micromanagement rarely comes from arrogance. More often, it comes from fear.
Fear of mistakes. “If I don’t step in, something will go wrong.”
Fear of failure. “If there’s a mistake, it’s my reputation on the line.”
Fear of letting go. “If I don’t do it, who will?”
These fears push leaders to grip tighter. They dive into details, override decisions, and re-do work. And what feels like “helping” to the leader feels like “mistrust” to the team.
The Impact on Teams (and Leaders)
The curse drains energy on both sides.
For the team: Initiative disappears. People stop solving problems creatively because they know their work will be second-guessed. Over time, resentment builds and they stop trying to get it right themselves.
For the leader: Burnout accelerates. You end up working longer, sleeping less, and resenting your team for not “stepping up” — when in reality, you’ve trained them not to.
I once coached a senior manager who worked 60-70-hour weeks. He told me, “If I don’t control everything, it all falls apart.” But when we spoke with his staff, they said the opposite: “We can’t step up because he doesn’t let us.” The cycle was exhausting everyone, and breaking trust in the process.
How to Break the Curse
Escaping the Curse of Over-Control doesn’t mean disappearing. It means shifting from control to coaching. Here’s how:
Delegate outcomes, not tasks. Instead of handing out instructions, share the result you need. For example: “We need a report that helps us make a decision by Tuesday, and you’re best positioned to develop that. Do you have questions before you get started?” instead of “Use this template and this font.”
Ask questions before giving answers. Swap “Here’s how to do it” for “What’s your approach?” This shows trust and builds capability.
Agree on checkpoints. Set clear points to review progress, then give space. This gives you peace of mind and keeps accountability without constant hovering.
Name the fear. Ask yourself honestly: “Am I controlling this because of quality, or because of anxiety?” Awareness is half the battle.
The Reflection Question
Do you ever redo your team’s work because it feels faster than offering feedback? That’s a red flag. What feels efficient in the short term is actually training your team not to take ownership, and keeping you as the person who owns all the problems
The Freedom of Letting Go
When leaders break the curse, something powerful happens:
Teams step up with ideas and initiative.
Trust grows, because people feel empowered, capable and respected.
Leaders get their time and energy back, able to focus on strategy instead of detail-policing.
Micromanagement isn’t a badge of high standards. It’s a symptom of low trust. And trust, once lost, is hard to rebuild.
Final Word
If you’ve ever felt yourself slipping into over-control, you’re not alone. Almost every leader does it at some point. The key is noticing it early and resetting.
That’s why this Halloween, we’re running a free online workshop:
5 Leadership Nightmares: Critical Mistakes and How to Avoid Them
Friday 31st October 2025 | 11:00 am WST
We’ll unpack the Curse of Over-Control, and four other nightmares that quietly erode trust, engagement, and performance. You’ll leave with practical strategies to coach, empower, and lead without burning yourself out.